This is MY Blog

Recently my Blog has become a little more interesting.

Apparently my writing style has come into question. Not everyone appreciates my honesty, my candor or how open I am with my life.

Some people that read my Blog are worried that this type of writing style may harm my children. That my kids do not need to read how hurt I am at times, that they do not need to read how the actions of their dad’s affect me and them. I can understand their worry and I appreciate that they care for the well being of my children. To them I have the following comments:

1. The post that started the chain of comments was about a true feeling that I was experience at the time. The events that led up to that post were real, the Rosenlof are actual people, friends, who have gone to the ends of the earth to save their children in Haiti and the Stalker family almost lost their child to a drowning incident that happened in their bathroom. The emotions I felt at the time I wrote that post were real. If I felt anger, I felt anger; if I felt sadness I felt sadness. I write what I feel; I believe that holding back those feelings and not expressing them are in the long run far more harmful. Teaching children that it is ok to have these types of emotions and how to deal with them is healthy, not hurtful in my opinion.

2. Maybe it is not the emotion that is offending you, but the content. I write about my life, what is happening around me. What my family and I have been doing, things that have been said and what we are going through or anything else that I pick out of the air to write about on that particular day. That may include topics that you are not comfortable with, people make mistakes in their lives, some that affect others, and some choices have consequences; whether I am a victim of these or the one who made them I am not the final judge, nor are you. You are entitled to your own opinion, and so am I, so I will write about them if I want to. I found it interesting that it had been months of “happy posts”, and yes I mean months of fluffy living-in-the-clouds kind of posts and the first one I write with actual hard core feeling and emotion stirs up the comments that were made… that in actuality had little to do with that post, and more about the fact that I wrote it.

3. There has to be a reason that you read my Blog. Outside of my friends and family, there are many I do not know. I do not have a problem with the many readers that are out there that I have never met, they do not know me outside of my Blog, and yet they are always welcome to read and leave comments and remain “Anonymous.” Some people get my Blog through a link of a friend, others stumble on it by accident, but whatever it may be, many come back often. What brings you back, pictures of my cute kids- there are plenty of cute kids in the world so that can’t be it, what is it? Are you simply Blog stalking to read that next post where I may say something regarding an ex-husband, where I may actually vent how I am feeling? This takes me to my next point.

4. Do you think that some of the people that read this Blog do so because they can relate? They too have had infidelity affect their lives, or they are single mothers, or have a teen that just wants to have the father figures in her life love her, whatever it may be you need to realize that these are MY experiences. Mine! Not yours, as similar as they may be EVERYONE is affected differently and may have a different way to heal, and deal with their lives. As strongly as you may feel that your way of dealing with things is the best way, and it may be for you, but it may not work for everyone. But in the end we CAN help each other, and if my way of dealing with things is not your way, then laugh at it and move on, if it helps in some small way then appreciate it, and if you prefer to not hear about it don’t read it!

5. In the end you need to know that I am going to continue to write the way I have always written. As with any written work, it is written in the point of view of the writer, in this case that is me, Lore Bunker. I may be blunt, brutal or nasty as one comment stated, but it is my life according to me. The funny thing is that I have a feeling that you will be checking back and reading it too. Maybe you will just be checking back to see what I have to say about you or my ex’s, so to all those involved in the “controversial Blog” ‘How do you turn your back??’ well here you go:

a. Anonymous Chicago: I never got a negative feeling from your comments, just genuine concern for my children. Thank you. I am sure that the events in your life have impacted your view on how you read my Blog. I assure you that ALL of my children love their dads very much, and that I am not feeding them negative or harmful information about the men they love. But I will not hide the emotions I have, they have a difficult enough time expressing and understanding their emotions as it is. They need to learn how to manage their emotions, and learn that no matter how painful some can be, you can move on and be happy.

b. Anonymous Centerville: It is apparent that you know some of the players in my world. I hope that going forward you can see this Blog from my point of view. My intention is never to be hurtful or to cause problems; I want the best for my kids in this not so perfect situation!

c. Brian Mease: Being your friend is not an issue, when I have tried to talk to you, you do not want to listen. We have nothing to say to each other outside of Alexis. It is not a secret that I think you should have a better relationship with her. I have NEVER told her anything negative about you as I am completely aware of the fact that you can be a great dad. I do feel that it is YOUR responsibility to foster that relationship and not mine, I can tell her that I feel that family is important till I am blue in the face and it will not matter if you never pick up a phone and call her- and I do mean pick it up, a text may be good for a quick HI, but it will never build a relationship.

d. Heidi Mease: I know you read my Blog. For whatever reason, to keep up to date on Alexis, to see what I may say about Brian or to find something about me to talk about, whatever it may be feel free to continue.

e. Melanie Ridgeway, Becky Heyder: AKA the wrath and peanut gallery. Thank you for being there to support me and for taking the time to get to know me so that you can understand my point of view.

f. Donovan Bunker: I think you are a wonderful man who cares for his children and for that I will be forever grateful. I pray that you will be able to continue this type of relationship with your children even when you have moved on and started another family. I have seen how you can be easily distracted and put the people that love you most aside for something fresh and new. I will always feel sadness and hurt for the way you walked out of Alexis’s life and how you turned your back on her. As for me, I have forgiven you, it is not my place to judge you and holding onto the pain you caused me would only lead me to a life of unhappiness. I know now that we are better people not being married to each other. I know that you would like me to be your friend but I will never be able to do that, I will always be cordial and polite while talking to you, but you are nothing more to me than a contract that was signed by a judge and I have to live by.

As always comments are welcome.