Looking Back on 2008 and Forward to 2009

I have had better years, but not one as interesting as this one.
I went from married to single, a mother of 4 to 5 and a housewife to a working mom and somewhere along the way I discovered the things in life that are really important.

I realized that other people’s free agency can affect your life, but that you choose your own path of happiness.
I learned to accept help from others, even when I thought I could manage on my own.
I discovered that I am far more capable of taking care of myself, my children and the world around me than anyone expected.
I found out that I am smarter than I thought I was, even thought I did not get a degree in college or serve a mission for the church; I can still learn new things each day.
I have gained a greater appreciation for my family, friends, neighbors, coworkers and my father in heaven, because of the love they have shown me.

And in the end I learned that much of what I had discovered was because I put myself in the hands of the lord to help guide me and comfort me through the trials I was facing.

I am glad to put 2008 behind me; I look forward to the many “firsts” that 2009 has to bring. Cameron has a mountain of first to come including his first tooth, first step, and first word. Alexis will be turning 16 and she has her first date and first time driving a car ahead of her. Brittany, Courtney, Kyle and I will have many new first as well.

For 2009 my only New Years Resolution is to show more love to those around me through service, support, and by making myself available to them when they need me. I know that this may sound sappy but I know I can’t keep the weight loss resolution, so I am not even going to try. Feel free to leave a comment as to what your New Years resolution is and how long you expect to keep it.

I hope that the New Year brings much happiness and joy to your life.

Christmas Traditions

I don’t have many traditions in my family but I thought I would share the few we have.




My Tree
I don’t have a “traditional” Christmas tree. It is not filled with Santa’s or Snowmen, or colorful ball ornaments. It is what I would imagine a tree looking like if it was in the middle of the forest and birds and woodland fairies decided to decorate a tree. It is not over the top fancy or anything, it is just me.

Christmas Cards
I love receiving Christmas cards. I love checking the mail box everyday. For a few friends it is literally the only contact we have each year and it is fun to see how people have changed. I like reading the letters that are included, even thought we do not write one. Also, as painful as it can be, I like having a family picture taken and sent to everyone. So if I missed you here is this year’s family Christmas card picture.

Christmas Morning
If you have kids then you know that once a child sees a Christmas tree and opens their gifts there is no way they are going to leave their pile of new loot to get ready for the day. So my children are not allowed down the stairs or near the tree until they have showered and are dressed. I know it is mean, but I love it.

That is about it. I told you we don’t have many traditions. I want to wish everyone a happy holiday and the best at this time of year.

Donovan's Been Watering The Love Fern!

BEFORE

AFTER

Body Worlds

Want a lesson in anatomy? The Body Worlds exhibit in Salt Lake City is the place to go. It is an interesting mix of body parts and dead humans contorted into unique “sculptures”.

Body Worlds 3 & The Story of the Heart, is an exhibit where you learn about anatomy, physiology and health by viewing real human bodies. This sounds cool but honestly the white trash in me wanted to learn more about how they separated the muscles, tendons, blood vessels and removed the skin to make the exhibit than the intricacies of how a knee joint functions.

We took the option to have the hand held audio guide, who turned out to be a mono-tone man who almost had me asleep half way through, so I stopped listening to him and only listened to the things I thought were really cool.

The bodies are preserved through plastination, which is a method for specimen preservation invented by Dr. Gunther von Hagens in 1977. This exhibit has more than 200 authentic human specimens including whole body plastinates, organs, translucent body slices, and a special presentation on the heart. I only gagged once, at the tongue, it was HUGE!! The thought of that thing in my mouth… ugh still makes me gag!

I really liked the baby exhibit where it shows how a baby is formed and the changes it goes through the first few weeks. After that they turn into little babies and I had to walk through quickly, they were just too close to the size of Cameron and it sort of freaked me out.

Court and Alexis got a great anatomy lesson on what male parts look like, and as a side note they look the same on a dead guy as they do on a living man minus that little "sac".

In the end I learned that a fat person is fat all they way through thanks to that fat person that was sliced into transparent sheets. I also saw what smokers do to their lungs, and that is seriously disgusting! All and all I thought it was cool and it is definitely a once in a life time thing to go see.

Its all about Me Me Me!

(before I start I want to thank my sissy for this painful tag, it is huge!)

Whats your Favorite brand of jeans?
BKE’s from the Buckle. To be more specific, the BKE’s that are in my closet that I wore before Cameron that are a few sizes smaller than I am now!

What is your favorite restaurant? What do you get there?
I am not sure I have a favorite. Currently it is Teppanyaki, but I am always open to finding a new one.

What is your current favorite song?
Song… again, no favorite. I like Pink’s “Rock Star” it is my empowering song right now.

What's your "type"? Is that what you ended up with?
I like dark hair, blue eyes, tall, great teeth, and a guy that is not a wimp. Yep, that’s what I had, except for the blue eyes, twice even.

What is something unusual about you?
Is this unusual like I have a third nipple unusual or unusual like I drink everything with a straw unusual?

How do you describe your everyday style?
I was once a t-shirt and jeans kind of a girl, and then my sister moved in, now I wear a necklace and heals with my t-shirt and jeans.

What were the last three movies you saw? How were they?
I can’t recall the last movie I went to see, oh wait it was Iron Man. Loved it. That’s it. I guess I need to get out more.

What are your favorite TV characters?
I am with Tracy and Melanie, I love House. I am also a big fan of Hero on Hero’s.

What was the last book you read? How was it?
I started to read Brittany’s Fabelhaven, but I got half way and my life filled up with other things to do than read. The last book that I got through all of the way was The Host by Stephanie Meyer.

You are asked to bring your best dish to a party, what do you make?
I like my dad’s Chicken Tetrazzini, it’s pretty good.

What qualities do you find attractive in your significant other or a prospective one?
I like a guy that is a hard worker but can have fun, someone I can sit and talk to for hours and not run out of things to say, but the most important quality I want to find is someone who is honest, faithful and committed to me and my family. So far I am 0 for 2.

Is there a song that every time you hear it, it reminds you of a certain memory? What is it and why?
Not just one song, but the entire Lion King album reminds me of driving around in my jeep with my sissy because it would embarrass her when I played the Pumba song real loud. Sticking with the Disney theme, the opening song of Tarzan “You'll Be in My Heart" by Phil Collins still can put me in tears, I heard it for the first time just after I had Brittany while watching the movie. I think it was the lyrics:

Come stop your crying
It will be all right
Just take my hand
Hold it tight

I will protect you
from all around you
I will be here
Don't you cry

For one so small,
you seem so strong
My arms will hold you
keep you safe and warm

This bond between us
can't be broken
I will be here
Don't you cry

'Cause you'll be in my heart
Yes, you'll be in my heart
From this day on
Now and forever more
You'll be in my heart
No matter what they say
You'll be here
in my heart always
Always

Do you swear?
Sometimes, when I am really upset, but I don’t drop the big ones.

What is your worst vice?
I am late for everything!

Yeah yeah, being materialistic is bad. What is your favorite THING you own right now?
My house. It may not be my dream home, and it needs some work, but it is a source of comfort to me.

Coke or Pepsi?
Coke and not that diet stuff! I would crave it when I was pregnant. Now that I am not expecting I am back to non-carbonated drinks.

Beach, Mountains, Big City, Country, or Desert?
Beach, sure. Mountains, yes. Big City, not really. Country, ok. Desert, love the red rock, heat, sun… it’s at the top of the list.

What’s your favorite Candy?
Again with the “favorite” questions… ugh can’t I just enjoy it all? If I have to narrow it down, toffee is my preferred candy.

If you could dress your significant other (or prospective mate), how would you dress them?
What do they usually wear?You know the guys in the Ralph Lauren ads? Well that with a little of the Guess ad look... that would be perfect!

What is your favorite dessert?
Ugh freak, favorite… none, it depends on my mood.

What’s your least favorite fashion trend?
(Sorry Melanie) I hate Crocks; tell me how a cheep looking plastic shoe became a fashion trend? Seriously! The only thing worse than a crock is a crock made to look like Lightning McQueen from Cars.

How much did you love doing this??
Oh I can not thank you enough for tagging me sissy with this list of questions that gave me an opportunity to reveal a bit of myself. Because of this I too will tag all those that have taken the time to read through this and ask that they post it for us all to enjoy.

Things I have learned in 6 weeks.

My 6 week “vacation” is almost up and I return to work in two days. I have learned so much these past few weeks, here are a few things that I have learned:

1. Sleep should never be taken for granted. Take naps as often as you can.
2. If you say “Tony” around Alexis she gets worried that you are going to blog about him.

3. That mommy’s boobies are for milk and Kyle’s boobies are called mosquito bites.
4. That a football can be named “Baby Cameron” and needs to be fed often.

5. That putting on a swim diaper can hurt your boy parts.

6. 3 teenage girls do not equal one maid.
7. When you say “boys in da crib” it is not the same as on MTV.

8. No matter how much you burp Cameron, you will still get spit up on.
9. Enfamil formula with rice starch says it will reduce the frequency of spit up by over 40%, was obviously not tested on my kids. 10. The T-Mobil Allowance feature that allows you to disable a phone at 9 pm is a wonderful thing, unless you are 15 years old and have a boyfriend.
11. That when a little boy says the blessing at dinner he can make all the girls giggle.
12. Wearing a b-ball shirt makes you cute.

13. Once you start receiving straight A’s in school you don’t have to tell your mom it is parent teacher conference night.
14. How great my neighborhood really is, and how many people care about us.
15. Family photos will ALWAYS be crazy, just pray that ONE works.

16. 50 burp cloths are not enough.

17. Everything goes with Ketchup.

18. The song "Love Song" sung over and over by a 10 year old can get old VERY fast!

I laughed for a minute and cried for an hour

It has been over a year since Donovan moved out, over 6 months since our divorce was final, and one month since I had his baby, and no I am not over it yet.
I can put up a tough outside, and for months I have to admit I felt absolutely NOTHING for him, a complete absence of feeling. Recently I have felt more, maybe it is the baby, ya, I am sure that has a lot to do with it, but I don’t like it!
I knew when I decided to not have him in the delivery room it was because I would not be able to handle him being nice, but last night it was just a simple text message at around 4am that made me laugh, smile and remember how I used to be able to send him messages and be funny. That was when I felt something I had not felt for so long it upset me. I don’t like when I remember how much I cared about him and loved him. I spent the next hour crying quietly into my pillow. It was icing on my already emotional day.

This brings up another topic I want to share; dating. No I am not dating, no I have not been on any dates and no I don’t want to. I am not ready. Mentally I don’t know how I would handle it, emotionally I know I can’t. So please don’t bother me about it, I have been asked twice just today if I have started dating, the answer is still no.

Did you catch that Cameron is one month today. He keeps my mind off of the things I can’t deal with, like people asking me if I am dating or problems with insurance and other stuff I just don’t want to get into. I am truly blessed to have him in my life, even if it means sleepless nights. Happy one month little goober.